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Later, with Joyce, I did get into some of what the doctor and I had spoken about. At first, I concentrated on what the doctor had said about the other wives, not about Joyce. She first accused me of making the whole thing up. Later, when I told her I was leaning towards not attempting to reconcile with the others, except for her and Shirley, she got quiet and didn't say too much. I knew Joyce well, her being quiet was like anyone else screaming."You don't think I should take this position, Joyce?"I wanted to get her talking to me about it. I was curious to hear what she thought about delaying dealing with these problems until after she and I were reconciled.Joyce didn't answer me right away. I could almost hear her thinking about how she wanted to express her thoughts to me."Our old Kenny wouldn't ever hold a grudge this way. That's one reason I'm finding it hard to believe what you're telling me. What you've said is more like what I'd expect from how you are now." I thought that too.. For the last two days I have beat off my cock three or four times a day shooting huge amounts of cum into my cum towel to relieve the pressure in my cum sac of my constantly churning balls producing cum driven by my fantasies of having constant exciting orgasmic sex with you and your powerful hot tight cunt and your luscious, sucking mouth. Lydia is bound to discover my obsessions over you and when she does it will not matter to her that it is not physical sex that I'm having with you but instead intangible sex of the mind that to her would be more of a betrayal of our solemn pact to not keep secrets from each other. And that would drive her away from me just as quickly as if she caught me fucking you in your cunt and mouth every day as she would realize that I yearned more for your body and your hot cunt and luscious mouth caressing my cock than I do for hers, even as I would have my cock sunk deep into her hot cunt or mouth enveloping my turgid cock sucking out all my cum to fill.
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